I just had someone come up and ask for a stapler. No problem, we have one. So I handed it to her. Instead of taking the stapler, she held out the papers expecting me to staple her papers for her! Um, no! She didn't even, get the hint and take the stapler. I actully had to tell her, "take the stapler, and you staple."

The library has a bulletin board highlighting the books we have about writing resumes. This includes a bibliography. A comes up to "See about gettin my resume done". I'm a little confused and explain that we don't offer any services like that, that the bulletin board is simply referring to books we own. He doesn't believe me and mentions that there were "names on the list" couldn't they do his resume. I had to explain to him that those "names" are the authors of the books, not employees of the library who would write a resume for him. He left clearly feeling cheated by our "misleading" display.

In trying to help someone revise their search strategy, I ask what it is about the results that aren't what she's looking for. It turns out it's not that they are off topic, or not in the library, but simply that they are in journals which are shelved upstairs. Sorry honey, changing the search strategy doesn't magically digitize text. These are the articles on the topic if they aren't full text, they aren't full text. Wishing won't make it so!

Is it too much to ask that someone look at their sylabus. I just had some one looking for the "Nursing 309 book" I'm trying all kinds of ways to find it, on reserve, keywords based on the name of the class. Finally she gets out the piece of paper with the full citation on it. Ummm you could have started with that, I don't have all of your course readings memorized, my world does not revolve around you.

He can open up Netscape, and get to Google, and even do a search, but I have to come over to explain to him that he has to click on the underlined link to get to the page listed. You would think you would learn that before you learned how to type in URL's and do searches. Hmmm?!

The library is unusually full of mothers toting along small children. My guess is that because it is the day before Thanksgiving they have the day off from work or classes or whatever. And while they would get child care for their children if they were at work or school, they just bring them along to the library. After all, we surely don't mind a bunch of whining, crying kids running around the library, and getting their sticky fingers all over the computers. I'd rather have dogs in the library, and I am decidedly NOT a dog-lover.

I just had a patron who wanted the latest edition of a textbook. When I handed her the one from 2002 asked if we had a more recent edition. Did she want me to fetch it from the future?

Patron on Phone: "Hello, I'm reading here that you close at 10:30pm"
Me: "yes"
Patron: "Does that mean that it's locked and no one can get in?"
Me: "Yes, that's what closed means."
Patron: "OK"