Patron on Phone: "Hello, I'm reading here that you close at 10:30pm"
Me: "yes"
Patron: "Does that mean that it's locked and no one can get in?"
Me: "Yes, that's what closed means."
Patron: "OK"

"I'm trying do a google search, but I can't find the icon on your computer."

At the last library I worked at, there tended to be more than one person working behind the desk at a time. Often when a patron got an answer they didin't like, they would keep asking the question of different people, hoping the answer would change. As if our journal subscription list will change depending on who you ask. Here, the opposite phenomena happens. I had a group of three students, each one asked me about the same citation (with the same piece of paper) hoping that the journal would be electronic. Do they really think that I'm keeping the existance of the electronic version secret from one of them but will tell another one of them. In the time it took for them to ask me three times if it was available electronically, they could have gone upstairs and made the photocopy already!

Person on Phone: "I'm looking for somebody that works at the library."
Me: "Do you know where in the library they work?"
Person on Phone: "On the inside."